A Good One

I promise to be the determinant of my own happiness. I promise to never let money come between the love I hold for my family. I promise to keep those in my life who make me a better person, and cut out the ones that don't. I promise to be a good listener. To never judge that which I do not know. I promise to be myself. I promise to count my blessings often. To give to others who need it. I promise to always mean well. To never undervalue the words: please and thank you, amd to use them no matter how big or small the favor is. No matter where life takes me, I promise to remember where I came from. To visit my parents a lot. To come home for Christmas. I promise to allow myself to be loved and to feel love for another person, and to say I love you when I do. I promise to say it often, not as a habit, but as a reminder. I promise to be a best friend. I promise to be there when I'm needed. I promise to dance a lot, and to not be afraid to make an idiot out of myself sometimes. I promise to remember what the good things are in life. I promise to never give up on my dream, no matter what. I promise to teach others how to love themselves. I promise to never forget where my scars came from. I promise to see the beauty in the simplest things, to take walks often, to slow down sometimes just to think. To go outside my comfort zone, to never be afraid to fail. I promise to listen attentively to my children, every thought, every idea, every anecdote the want to share with me. I promise to love them unconditionally no matter who they turn out to be, to support them in whatever they believe in, and to let them live their own lives the way they so choose. I promise to remind them of this daily. I promise to be kinder than necessary. I promise to see people beyond their exterior. I promise to know where my priorities lie and see the good in the world. And when I'm old and senile I promise to still promise, to hold true to what I believe in, and to know this life is precious and short and worthwhile- to know it's a good one.

Minutes

I used to think my best posts would happen when I had a lot on my mind. I've come to realize it's not when I'm thinking a lot that I write best, it's when I'm feeling a lot. My head doesn't seem to have much say in what I write most of the time, just like it doesn't have much say in how I feel. Trust me if it did, things would be very different. It seems like the older I get the more complicated things are. It's not just that I'm sick, It's that I'm sick on top of finals week. It's not just that I like a boy, it's that I like a boy that lives in a different state. I have so many more sources for my emotions, my frustration and my admiration and my confusion and my happiness. I feel things deeper than I have before. When I'm somewhere I like to be all there, and feel it fully and deeply. Even if that means staying awake for as many minutes as possible, just to feel that unadulterated happiness for just a tad longer. Because I've learned, as with so many other things, it's certainly not limitless. tooo be continued..

Last week I did something pretty awesome. Think about it, when's the last time you could say that? It really doesn't happen all that often. I think there's a lot of value in listening to people. Giving them your undivided attention. Letting them know that what they think really matters. Learning about what they care about. Noticing what makes their faces light up in passion. I really think peoples' words speak volumes to their personalities. No pun intended. I especially noticed this with my Girls on the Run team. Last week we had our ending celebration. We assigned each girl a particular award based on her character. We were instructed to call each girl up and say a nice thing about her personality and then give her her award. Without really even thinking much of it, I was able to do this, without tripping over words or pausing to think about what to say, even in a room full of middle aged parents- it came so effortlessly. I've really been learning a lot about myself lately, which I find just fantastic. So sorry if you don't like hearing about sappy self identity stories. Cause there's going to be a lot coming real soon. I love being looked up to. I love learning about people and being able to express how great they are. I love seeing the good and teaching others to see the good. I love having the confidence to stand in the front of a room and speak so effortlessly about people and things I care so much about. It's a really great feeling.